In a dirty and messy family environment, there are plenty of children with poor hearts

▲ If you have a daughter at home, clicking on the card above and following the chaotic family environment with just one click will be like poison, eroding the child’s vitality. Creating a warm, tidy, and comfortable home will be a lifelong blessing for children—— Deer Mama ◆ ◆ ♬ Click on the green icon above to listen to the audio of Yan Jiao, the anchor of the Daughter Party, reading aloud. Truly powerful children have a calm and composed mind, can think independently, and actively solve problems. How can we help children stay away from anxiety and internal conflicts, and shape a strong inner self? On the morning of December 16th at 9:00, I clicked to make an appointment for a live broadcast room and invited Dr. Jia Xinchao, a Ph.D. in education, to teach you how to use positive psychology to cultivate children’s “big picture” ▽▽▽▽▽▽▽ Author | Tomato Mom Source | Boy Pie (ID: boy666dj). I saw this question on Zhihu: “What is it like to live in a dirty and messy home for more than ten years?” With a high view count of 23.85 million, many netizens shared their own home in the comments, which was truly eye opening. Some are filled with cardboard boxes and garbage everywhere, and there is not even a place to stand in the room. Some families have piles of clothes, with various rotten foods hidden under them, which are rancid and smelly. Some coffee tables are piled up with pots, pans, and expired seasonings, surrounded by dust These netizens expressed that living in such a dirty and messy environment has had a lot of impact on their lives: “I have felt restless and unable to concentrate on things since I was young.” “The messy and messy environment of my original family has caused me great trouble, and even changed my life trajectory.” “I have always argued and even fought with them since I was young. The family is too oppressive, and I chose to go to a faraway place to study at university.” Remembering Swedish educator Ellen Kay’s point, “The environment plays a very important role in a person’s growth, and a good environment is the foundation for children to form correct thoughts and excellent personalities.” After reading the experiences of these netizens, I truly understand that in a dirty and messy family environment, it is easy to raise children. A child with a poor heart. A dirty and messy environment cannot cultivate children with strong happiness. After years of research, Harvard Business School has found a phenomenon: successful individuals with strong happiness often have a very clean and tidy home environment; Unfortunately, people usually live in a messy and dirty environment. The family environment hides the life status of each member, as well as the energy and happiness of a child. In a public welfare film called “Orphanage” in Finland, there is a scene where a pair of well behaved siblings come to an adult orphanage and prepare to choose their ideal parents. The first pair: Dad is reading a book, Mom is cleaning the room clean and tidy, occasionally looking at each other with eyes full of love. Second couple: The couple dined together, filled with laughter and joy, and the kitchen was clean and tidy. The third pair: The two stood under the cherry blossom tree on a date, looking romantic and loving, with a harmonious atmosphere. Fourth pair: Mom is drinking excessively, Dad is shouting loudly, and the house is in a mess. It’s amazing that when children see the first three pairs of parents, they seem to be able to empathize and naturally show a happy smile. But when they saw the fourth pair of parents, their expressions immediately became solemn, frightened, and bewildered. A good family atmosphere not only brings joy and happiness to people’s lives, but also provides a continuous supply of nutrients for children’s growth. The chaotic family atmosphere is like poison, slowly eroding the vitality of children. Imagine what would happen to a child’s body and mind if they lived in a chaotic and breathless home? Netizen @ Jingzhe recalled that he had a junior high school classmate who, at a young age, always had a faint sadness on his face. Once, he went to play at this classmate’s house and was shocked when he entered. His living room was filled with various delivery boxes and dirty clothes, and the dishes in the sink seemed to have accumulated for several days, with even small flies flying around. The classmate’s mother warmly welcomed him to sit down, but in reality, there was not even a place to sit on the sofa At that moment, he finally understood the root of his classmates’ unhappiness. How can children be happy from the bottom of their hearts living in such a messy family? Living in a messy family environment for a long time not only affects children’s mood and comfort, but also disrupts their pace of life and absorbs nutrients from their lives. A dirty and messy environment cannot cultivate emotionally calm children. Renowned organizer Shu An once shared his experience of home storage. A mother with two children leads a chaotic life every day. Her eldest son is particularly prone to mania, irritability, and easily loses his temper; The younger son doesn’t like to talk and often feels depressed. She is also very depressed herself, sometimes experiencing chest tightness and shortness of breath, and has already developed symptoms of depression. The organizer looked through the entire room before finding the crux of the problem – her home was too messy, with shopping bags, children’s toys, and scattered clothes and utensils in the kitchen and living room. Sometimes there are too many items piled up, and even the sunlight cannot shine in. The book ‘Sweeping Power’ says: A room is an energy field. The negative energy released by dirty and messy rooms can be unconsciously transmitted to family members, leading to emotional outbursts, anxiety, helplessness, decreased self-esteem, fatigue, and other problems. Living in a chaotic environment for a long time can easily lead to irritability, depression, and low mood. No wonder some netizens say: Every time I go home, I feel as uncomfortable as a fly growing in my heart; Some netizens also said: it’s just being constantly restless and upset. The answer of @ Liangxi Roll Fat Cat is to the point: when your home is clean and tidy, your internal boundaries will continue to expand until they cover the entire house. You will feel invincible, overwhelmed with emotions, and full of energy. When the house is dirty and crowded, the internal boundaries will continuously shrink, all the way into the body. Then, you will feel inexplicably irritable, filled with an unnamed wildfire. This is because your boundary (leader) is constantly shrinking and losing. Subconsciously, it will constantly remind you that you are becoming weaker and less capable. A chaotic environment cannot cultivate children with stable and peaceful emotions. In the long run, children may lack sunshine in their hearts and even easily develop anxiety and depression. A dirty and messy environment cannot raise a child with a broad mind. Below this post, an anonymous netizen’s answer left a deep impression on me. She revealed that her messy upbringing almost ruined her life. Her parents never liked to clean up since they were young. The house was dirty and messy all year round, with a desk
It’s a layer of dust. After dinner, I don’t boil the pot. I watch TV first and go to bed when I see it late. I wash it before the next meal. When she was a child, she used a plastic comb with a thick layer of black oil that could be scraped off with her nails; I remember one time, there was a choir competition in the class, and the teacher required everyone to wear a white shirt. Her mother spent a long time rummaging through a pile of dirty clothes at night, only to find a piece of clothing with stains. The next day, she wore this outfit to school and was ridiculed by her classmates for a long time. At that time, several close friends would take turns visiting someone’s house, but she had never invited anyone to her house because she dared not. Later on in the college entrance examination, she chose a school far away from home just to stay away from this home. The most unfortunate thing is that for so many years, the shadow brought by her family of origin has been like shackles, trapping her in a narrow situation. She is sensitive, insecure, and evasive, afraid to go to large shopping malls or wear beautiful dresses because she always feels unworthy; Even after starting work, when encountering a slightly high-quality male, I dare not approach them, always feeling that I am not worthy of them. Later, she talked to a boyfriend and after spending over a year together, he suggested visiting her house, but she instinctively refused. After her boyfriend’s repeated questioning, she decided to break up. The external environment is a projection of a person’s inner self. A dirty and messy room can ruin a child’s inner order and life structure. It is difficult for us to find a child with a broad mind and an elegant soul in a messy family. Raising children, material scarcity can also be compensated for spiritually, but once a child’s heart becomes barren, they will eventually be abandoned for a lifetime. A clean and tidy home is the best nourishment for children. Remember once, I visited a friend’s house. From the moment you enter, there is a sense of comfort that hits your face. Bright floor tiles, neatly arranged shoe cabinets at the entrance, and a vase on the coffee table with a few scattered flowers, all reveal the owner’s elegance and meticulousness. My friend’s son is doing homework in the study. I handed him the snacks I brought, and he happily said, “Thank you, Auntie.” During our conversation, I looked around the study and saw that the books on the shelves were neatly arranged, and the desktop was also clean and tidy. Entering the kitchen, my friend is busy around the stove, and there is no common greasiness or hot flashes in the kitchen. The dishes, utensils, and seasonings are well-organized, making it particularly refreshing. According to a friend, his son is the class monitor, with an outgoing personality and a particularly good social circle. He enjoys reading and never lets his parents worry. I have heard the saying: ‘A person’s room exposes their living conditions, while a home’s room state hides the future of a child.’. A tidy home environment is like a natural positive energy field, giving each member a positive impact. Only with such a warm and fresh family atmosphere can children be nurtured with inner wealth and abundant souls. In Fukuoka, Japan, there is a father named Tomohiro Mori who likes to use a camera to record the lives of his family. In his photos, a couple, two children, and three dogs are trivial, ordinary, yet exceptionally vivid. It is worth noting that the furnishings in the home are very elegant and tidy, revealing the owner’s intentions everywhere. The room is always spotless from the floor, dining table, to carpet. Living in such a room, no wonder the faces of the family are always filled with healing and warm smiles. The two children grew up lively and lovely in such a clean and bright environment. A good family environment will subtly influence children, determining their living habits, personality traits, and values. Living in a clean and warm room, children are not only more sunny and emotionally calm, but also more diligent and proactive in their work. There is an old saying that goes: A clean home and a peaceful life bring good fortune. The family environment constantly influences the happiness and vitality of children. To cultivate a sunny and positive child, the first step is to create a warm, tidy, and comfortable home environment. A clean house not only brings good fortune to the whole family, but also strengthens the cohesion of the family. Click ‘Watching’ and let’s work together to create a good growth space for children and build the most solid bridge in life* Source: Boy Pie (ID: boy666dj), all the tips on raising boys are available here; The bitterness and sweetness of raising boys are all understood here; There is a little boy at home, welcome to follow Boy Pie* Some of the images in this article are from Tuchong Creative. Dear, if our article is helpful to you, please “set us as stars” ★! So you won’t miss the daily push! Parenting starts with nurturing oneself. Long press the image below to recognize the QR code, and follow our daughter’s faction to grow together at 8 pm every night