Awakening Thunder for Ordinary Parents

In our materialistic society, many parents see their children as “responsibilities” or “tasks”, investing all their energy and time into them, thinking about “paving the way for their children’s future”.

But in fact, we often overlook the most important fact: what children really need is not the excessive responsibility of their parents, but their happiness and growth.

During this period, I have deeply reflected on my role as a parent, and in conversations with many parents, I have discovered a common misconception: they are accustomed to placing their emotions and life focus entirely on their children, but forget that the most important source of a child’s healthy growth lies in the parents’ own mentality and life status.

If parents always live in anxiety, repression, sacrifice, and dissatisfaction, children will also feel these negative emotions.

What children don’t need is all your dedication, but your self-awareness and healthy mindset as parents.

Firstly, children are not your ‘unfinished projects’. Many parents see their children as carriers of their own unfulfilled wishes.

I hope that children can inherit their ideals and fulfill those dreams that they were unable to achieve when they were young.

So, they impose countless expectations and pressures on their children, demanding that they learn this subject and do that activity, as if their existence is to fulfill their wishes.

However, we often overlook that children are independent individuals who also have their own emotions, interests, and needs.

We must deeply recognize that the arrival of children is an opportunity for us to better understand ourselves and the world.

They don’t owe us anything. As parents, we should be grateful for our children’s willingness to accompany us on a journey of life, rather than seeing them as tools or “spokespersons” for unfulfilled dreams.

Only when parents adjust their mentality and no longer place all their expectations on their children can they truly experience the freedom and beauty of life, rather than carrying heavy burdens.

Secondly, in modern education where children do not serve the “anxiety” of their parents, many parents define their children’s success as numerical grades, academic rankings, or so-called “excellence”.

For these goals, parents often sacrifice their children’s free time, emotional world, and mental health.

However, the value of a child is never just measured by numbers and grades. True education is to cultivate children’s independent thinking ability, strong inner world, sound personality, and love for life.

As parents, we should not let our children become victims of our anxiety. We should not project our own ‘anxiety’ onto children, allowing them to unconsciously bear the dreams and expectations that they have not been able to achieve.

Instead of letting children exhaust themselves in endless learning and competition, it’s better to focus on their mental health, care about their emotional needs, cultivate their interests and hobbies, and let them grow up in a healthy and happy environment.

A mentally healthy, confident, and optimistic child will surely be able to better face setbacks and difficulties in life, and go further and more steadily.

Thirdly, the best education parents can give their children is to become happy people. “The happiness of parents is the happiness of children.

” This sentence may seem simple, but it contains profound truths. If parents themselves are not happy, how can children feel happy.

If parents constantly convey negative emotions, the child’s life will also become heavy and stressful.

The best education parents can truly give their children is to show them an image of a parent with ideals, pursuits, and a sense of happiness.

A happy parent can bring positive energy to their child and make them feel the beauty and hope of life.

We cannot spend all our time on trivial matters and forget to cultivate our interests and live our own lives.

We cannot simply blame children for not being sensible enough, while ignoring whether we can achieve physical and mental health and a cheerful mood.

If parents can show a positive and optimistic attitude in daily life, children will naturally imitate and absorb it, and grow into equally positive individuals.

Fourthly, the role of parents is that of guides, not controllers. As parents, our task is not to control everything about our children, but to guide them to discover their own interests and potential.

We should spend more time with children and give them more freedom to experience life, rather than letting their world be constrained by learning, grades, and rules.

Children have the right to choose their own interests and hobbies, and as parents, we should respect their choices, be supporters and friends on their life path, rather than forcing them to follow the trajectory we set.

When we let go of excessive intervention and control, learn to grow together with children, and enjoy every moment with them, our parent-child relationship will become more harmonious, and children’s growth will be healthier and happier.

As ordinary parents, our lives are not easy. The pressure of work, life, and family often makes us feel exhausted.

However, we cannot ignore our responsibilities and roles as parents just because of the difficulties in life.

We need to realize that what children really need is not your constant giving, but your own growth and happiness as parents.

If these cannot be achieved, you may consider whether you have the ability to provide children with a healthy and happy growth environment.

If one cannot provide the best mentality and support for their child, then perhaps not having children is a form of kindness towards them.

And if we decide to become parents, we must constantly awaken and give our children the best gifts – happiness, freedom, independence, and a healthy life.

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