When I learned about dopamine education, I finally made my daughter more proactive and self disciplined in her studies

I am a mother of two children. My daughter is in the second year of junior high school this year, and my son is still in kindergarten.

From an outsider’s perspective, my family seems to be a winner in life: affluent, with two children, a caring husband, and healthy parents.

But only I know that the daily anxiety has quietly eroded my heart. The root of the problem lies in my daughter.

Since she entered junior high school, my anxiety has never stopped. Her grades are declining every year.

In the first year of junior high school, she occasionally achieved good grades, but in the second year, the situation took a sharp turn for the worse.

Her concentration is poor, and her learning attitude has gradually become negative. Although she was well behaved when she was a child, she increasingly appears to be disheartened by learning.

As a mother, I have invested too much energy into her studies, but the results often backfire. I have tried various methods: strict requirements, excessive supervision, and even punishment.

However, no matter how harsh it was, it did not achieve the expected effect and instead made her increasingly averse to learning, even leading to emotional breakdowns.

I even began to doubt whether I was a failed mother and why parenting methods always didn’t work. Until one day, I heard an education expert mention the concept of ‘dopamine education’.

Experts say, “If children want to learn actively and maintain self-discipline, they must feel the joy and sense of achievement in learning.

This way, their brains will secrete dopamine, gradually cultivating their interest and enthusiasm for learning.

” This sentence is like a lightning bolt, illuminating the fog in my heart. Did my actions all along unintentionally make my daughter lose her motivation to learn.

So, I decided to try a new way of education – “dopamine education”. Simply put, it is to encourage children’s interest in learning through positive feedback, and gradually establish their confidence and self-discipline in learning.

I began to reflect that I used to focus too much on her grades and overlook her emotions and psychological feelings.

So, I adjusted my educational methods mainly from two aspects: empathy and encouragement. 1. Empathy first, then encouragement.

Every time I see my daughter facing difficulties in her studies, I remember that she is also a child, with her fears and confusion.

I started learning to look at problems from her perspective, trying to understand her inner struggles.

Once, she said to me, ‘Why am I so stupid. I tried hard but couldn’t do well in the exam. ‘ Her tone was filled with self blame and helplessness.

I am well aware that at that time, what she needed most was not criticism, but understanding and support.

I gently patted her shoulder and said, ‘You’re not stupid. Everyone has their own difficulties. Mom used to find math difficult when she was a child, and even failed exams.

But you see, Mom is doing well now, isn’t she. ‘ By sharing her story, I felt her emotions gradually loosen, and her eyes were no longer filled with tears, but with a smile.

Since then, I have tried my best to avoid criticizing her and instead focus more on listening and understanding her feelings.

Slowly, my daughter began to accept my company instead of seeing me as a complete ‘accuser’. She can feel my understanding and support for her, and this power of empathy has made her learning attitude increasingly positive.

2. Motivate children and stimulate the brain to secrete dopamine. The biggest secret of dopamine education is timely motivation and encouragement.

I will give her positive feedback in a timely manner, whether it is small progress or effort after completing tasks.

Every time my daughter completes an assignment or solves a difficult problem, I immediately praise her and say, “Great, she’s getting smarter and smarter.

” Even if she only completes a simple task, I give her affirmation and say, “Well done, keep going. ” This timely encouragement fills her with a sense of achievement, and this positive emotional feedback also inspires her greater learning motivation.

Whenever she feels praised for her efforts, her brain secretes dopamine, which in turn stimulates more learning motivation.

She became increasingly confident, gradually transitioning from a state of avoidance towards learning to a state of active learning.

I have found that encouragement is not just a recognition of learning behavior, it also helps children build confidence.

When she sees her efforts being recognized by her parents, she believes that her efforts are worth it and becomes more invested.

Even after the exam results came out, my daughter confidently said to me, ‘Mom, my grades were pretty good this time, but I feel like I can do better.

I will work harder next time. ‘ I used to focus on my daughter’s exam results, hoping she could enter a prestigious school, but now I have learned to pay more attention to the learning process.

In her learning journey, even if it was a small improvement, I would give her praise and tell her, ‘You have improved even more today than yesterday, great.

‘ This way of focusing on the process gradually made her realize that learning itself is not just about grades, but about improving oneself and enjoying the fun of learning.

The result did not disappoint me either. After several months of adjustment, my daughter’s learning attitude has undergone significant changes.

She started actively arranging her study time and her learning efficiency greatly improved. When the mid-term exam results came out, she ranked in the top 200.

Although she still didn’t make it to the top 100, she became more confident and told me, “Mom, I think I can do better.

” Conclusion: Through “dopamine education,” I finally made my daughter’s learning more proactive and self disciplined.

She no longer resists learning due to pressure, but has learned to enjoy the process of learning and even actively seek ways to solve difficulties.

As a mother, I have also learned how to understand and support her with heart, how to guide her with encouragement and empathy, and help her become more determined on the road of learning.

The transformation of family education not only changed my daughter’s learning attitude, but also made our relationship closer and more harmonious.

I believe that over time, she will become more confident and independent, becoming not only a child who strives for grades, but also a person who enjoys the process of growth.

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