Introducing Kids to Club Volleyball: What Parents Should Know Before Signing Up
Last April, I stood leaning against our dented minivan after my 12-year-old daughter Lila’s final rec volleyball game, picking crumbs of Goldfish off my jeans and waiting for her to say she was ready to leave. She was still peeling her grass-stained knee pads off, one strap stuck on her shin guard, and mumbled something that didn’t register at first. “Can I try out for club?” she asked. I froze. Up until that point, club volleyball to me was just the thing the super sporty moms posted about on Facebook: all expensive travel tournaments, 6 a.m. practices, and kids who’d been bumping sets before they could read. I had no idea how it worked, or if it was something a kid who’d only played 8 months of rec could even do.
I texted Lila’s rec coach first, who said the local club had a developmental entry team for new players, and they weren’t cutting anyone who showed up ready to learn. I checked the price breakdown, and it was $550 for the entire season, which included uniforms and all local tournament fees – no out-of-state travel required for the entry level. That was less than we’d spent on the art classes Lila quit after two months the year before, so I figured we could risk it. The tryout was a two-hour open gym that smelled like old rubber floor and lemon Gatorade. Lila spent the first 20 minutes hiding behind me twisting the end of her ponytail, convinced everyone else was already ten times better. By the end, she’d laughed through three missed serves and made a couple of solid passes, and the coach said she was in.
Practices are twice a week, 6 to 8 p.m., 20 minutes from our house. We have one Saturday tournament a month, all within an hour’s drive. I was convinced this would derail our whole routine. Lila started middle school this year, homework loads got heavier, and I thought we’d end up rushing every night, skipping family dinners, turning into those people that live at the gym. What actually happened surprised me. Before club, Lila would come home from school, drop her backpack on the couch, and scroll TikTok for an hour and a half before even thinking about homework. Now, she knows she has to leave the house by 5:15 for practice, so she sits down at the kitchen table right after she gets off the bus and knocks out most of her work before we leave. If she has a test the next day, she does the study guide in the car on the way to practice, or after we get home. It’s never turned into the crisis I expected.
The biggest change I didn’t see coming was how it shifted how she handles losing. Lila always hated any kind of competition where she didn’t come out on top. If she lost a round of Uno, she’d throw her cards down and storm to her room, and wouldn’t talk to anyone for 20 minutes. After three months of club, her team lost every game in their first tournament, and they still went to the concession stand, shared a giant blue raspberry snow cone, and joked about how bad their passing was. Lila came home that day and said “We were terrible, but I got one ace, so that’s okay.” Last week, we played Monopoly as a family, and she landed on my Boardwalk with a hotel, and just laughed and handed over her money instead of pouting. That’s a bigger win than any trophy she could bring home.
A lot of the fear I had about club was based on myths I picked up from other parents, so I’ve picked up a few concrete things that work for anyone thinking of trying it. First, don’t jump straight to an elite club right away. Almost every local club has an entry-level or developmental division for new players, and it’s not just for kids who don’t think they’re good enough. These teams have lower costs, less travel, and more flexible attendance if your kid has other things going on. Before you sign up for any tryouts, email the club coordinator and ask three straight questions: do you have teams for first-year club players, what is the total cost including all fees and uniforms, and how far do you travel for tournaments. Don’t just rely on the website – I found out the elite team at our club was three times the price of the entry team, which saved me a lot of sticker shock later.
If your kid is nervous about tryouts, tell them this: most entry-level teams don’t cut kids who want to be there. Coaches just want to see that you show up, pay attention, and try your best. Lila was so scared she’d mess up and get cut, I told her to just focus on passing the ball to the target three times in a row – that’s all she had to do. She didn’t even hit that goal, and she still made the team. For daily routine, the small thing that has kept us from going crazy is prepping the night before. We keep a duffel bag with extra knee pads, hair ties, socks, and a water bottle by the front door, all packed. Every Sunday, I stock a cooler with granola bars, fruit, and Gatorade that we can grab for practices or tournaments, so we don’t end up buying overpriced concession stand chips every time. And if your kid has a big test or a family event, it’s okay to miss a practice – good entry-level coaches don’t penalize you for that. I was scared to ask if Lila could miss a practice for my grandma’s birthday, and the coach just said “Of course, tell her happy birthday for us.” No drama, no guilt.
It’s not all perfect, of course. It does take time. Some weekends, we can’t go to my sister’s barbecue, or we have to leave my son’s soccer game a little early to get to a tournament. I spend a lot of Saturday mornings sitting on hard bleachers reading my Kindle, which isn’t the worst thing in the world, but it’s not always fun. Lila has had days where she comes home frustrated because she didn’t get much playing time, or she messed up a serve in a close game. We don’t fix it for her, we just get her a snack and let her talk about it, and she’s usually over it by bedtime.
This season wraps up next month, and Lila already asked if she can sign up again next year. I don’t know if she’ll ever move up to the A team, or play in high school, let alone college. Right now, it’s her thing. It’s taught her to show up on time, manage her work, and lose without throwing a fit. It’s not for every kid, and it’s not for every family. But if your kid comes to you after rec practice asking if they can try club, you don’t have to say no just because you think it’s only for elite athletes or wealthy families. There’s a spot for most kids who want to play, you just have to look for the right team. We still have our chaotic nights, where we’re running late and can’t find a knee pad, and Lila forgets her homework in the car. But that’s just life, right? It’s working for us, for now.
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