Where to Find Age-Appropriate Anti-Racism Resources for 5 Year Olds
I was wiping cherry popsicle juice off the thigh of my jeans when my 5-year-old, Mia, trotted over from the jungle gym, juice box still in hand, and tugged my sleeve. “Mom,” she said, voice half curious half confused, “why is that girl’s skin darker than mine?”
I froze. I’ve known I wanted to talk about race and fairness with Mia since she was little, but I had no idea the question would come this early, or that I’d be so unprepared to answer it in the moment. I mumbled something about different families having different colors, and she nodded and ran back to play, but that night I sat down at my laptop and started searching for resources that fit a 5-year-old. What I found surprised me. Most of the content that popped up was for middle schoolers or adults, full of heavy history and abstract concepts that would go right over a kid who still negotiates for an extra cookie before dinner every night. A few think pieces even argued I owed it to my kid to explain systemic injustice right now, and I closed that tab with my chest tight. I had no idea where to start.
I reached out to Mia’s preschool teacher the next day, and she put it simply for me: 5-year-olds don’t think in abstract terms. They notice differences, they care deeply about what’s fair, and that’s it. You don’t need to teach them the entire history of racism to lay the groundwork for anti-racism. All you need right now are resources that help them talk about what they already see, and learn to treat everyone with kindness, no matter what they look like. That shifted everything for me. I stopped looking for big curriculums and started looking for small, simple things that fit into our daily life.
The first place I started was books, and the three that have become permanent on Mia’s nightstand are all light, story-driven, and perfect for her age. The Skin You Live In is my favorite – it uses simple rhymes and bright, playful illustrations to celebrate all different shades of skin, from pale peach to deep brown. It never gets into heavy topics, it just points out that everyone’s skin is perfect for them, and difference is fun. Hair Love is another hit – it’s a sweet, short story about a dad learning to do his Black daughter’s curly hair, and the pictures are so expressive Mia always points out how pretty the braids are. Last Stop on Market Street is a little more layered, but it works for 5-year-olds because it focuses on community and noticing the good in everyone, no matter what their life looks like. All three are under 30 pages, perfect for bedtime reading, and none of them feel like a lecture.
After books, I picked up a $3 pack of multi-cultural crayons from Target, and it’s turned into one of the most useful tools I have. The pack has eight different skin tone crayons, instead of just the one “peach” and one “brown” that come in regular packs. Mia and her friends color self portraits almost every weekend now. Last week, Zara – the girl Mia asked about at the playground – came over for a playdate, and she picked the warm deep brown crayon for her skin, saying it matched the chocolate cake her abuela bakes for birthdays. Mia picked the light peach one, said it matched the cherry popsicle she had that day, and they moved on to coloring rainbows. It was just play, but it gave them a natural way to talk about the differences they already notice, without making it weird or taboo.
I’ve also found short, simple clips from kids’ shows that work well for lazy afternoons. Sesame Street has a two-minute clip called “We’re Different, We’re Same” that’s silly, catchy, and perfect for 5-year-olds – Mia sings it in the car all the time. Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood has an episode about including a new friend who looks different from everyone else, and it frames the lesson around the simple rule “invite everyone to play” that Mia can actually remember. I don’t do more than 10 minutes of this a week, but it’s a low-effort way to reinforce the ideas we talk about.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned through all this is that I was overcomplicating it. Early on, I thought I should say “we don’t see color” to avoid making it a big deal, but that doesn’t work – kids already see color. If you pretend you don’t, it just makes them think it’s a bad thing to ask about. Now, if Mia asks a question about someone’s skin or hair, I just answer it simply, honestly, and move on. At her birthday party a few weeks back, a little boy refused to hold Zara’s hand for Ring Around the Rosie, and I just walked over, held both of their hands, and said “Everyone gets to play this game. Holding hands with friends is fun, no matter what your skin looks like.” He shrugged, held her hand, and everyone laughed when the ring collapsed five seconds later. No big speech needed.
I still don’t have it all figured out. As Mia gets older, she’ll ask harder questions, and I’ll need to find new resources that fit her growing understanding. There will be moments I fumble, and moments I say the wrong thing, and that’s okay. Right now, though, this is enough. Small, daily moments, simple stories, and play that lets her explore what she already notices. Last week, I watched Mia and Zara race across the playground, both screaming that they won, and I didn’t need anything more than that. This work is gradual, and it starts small. For a 5-year-old, small is more than enough.
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