What Happens When You Do Two Degrees From Two Universities At Once: My Regret And Practical Advice
It’s 2 a.m. and I’m staring at two different final exam papers spread across my kitchen table, the edge of my chipped bookstore coffee mug staining the corner of my biology midterm from State U. Next to it sits my sociology research paper draft for the online private college 300 miles away. The clock ticks, and I can’t remember the last time I slept more than four hours straight, or went a whole day without mixing up assignment due dates between the two programs. That three a.m. panic three years ago was when I first admitted to myself I regretted the whole thing. I’d signed up for two full bachelor’s degrees from two separate universities at the same time, and now I was stuck.
I was 19 when I made the call, fresh out of high school, top of my class, and convinced I needed to get ahead as fast as possible. I’d gotten into both my dream biology program at State and a competitive sociology program online that aligned with my long-term plan to work in public health. Everyone around me told me how impressive it was that I was ambitious enough to pull it off. My dad kept telling friends “if anyone can do it, it’s her.” The only person who pushed back was my academic advisor at State U, who told me over a 20-minute meeting that the credit transfer rules would never work in my favor, and double the work would mean half the quality in both. I left that meeting thinking she was just gatekeeping, that she didn’t believe a 19-year-old could handle what she thought was too much.
The first semester was fine. I ran on energy drinks and skipped a few parties, but I pulled mostly A’s, so I thought I’d proven everyone wrong. By the second year, core classes got harder, and the cracks started to show. The online school’s advisor who’d verbally agreed to accept 15 of my State gen ed credits left for another job, and the new advisor said their policy only allowed 10 transfer credits total. That meant I had to retake three classes I’d already passed, adding six extra credit hours to my load. Last fall, I had a biology midterm at State at 9 a.m. and a sociology final paper deadline the same day at 11:59 p.m. I left my biology notes sitting on top of my laptop that held the paper draft, and had to drive 45 minutes back to my apartment to get them, missing the first 20 minutes of the exam. I walked out with a C+, which dropped my overall State GPA enough that I lost my partial scholarship. I had to pick up extra night shifts waiting tables just to cover the gap, which took even more time away from studying.
I’d already spent $15,000 in tuition between the two schools by that point, and I couldn’t bring myself to walk away. But I was miserable. Every day was just catching up, never feeling like I was doing well at either program, and I missed the things that used to keep me grounded: I’d quit my bookstore job, missed my best friend’s wedding, and hadn’t been home for Christmas in two years because I had to take winter session classes for both degrees. When I started reaching out for advice, I realized how many other students are in this same spot, and how many parents have kids coming to them with this same ambitious plan. That’s why I wanted to share what I’ve learned, both for parents and for anyone stuck feeling like I did.
If you’re a parent whose kid just told you they want to do two degrees from different schools at once, the first thing I’d tell you is not to just gush about how smart and ambitious they are. Instead, ask them to write down three regular things they do every week right now that they will cut to make time for double the coursework. I never had anyone ask me that when I was 19. I just assumed I’d cut a little sleep and a few parties, and that would be enough. I never thought I’d have to cut the job I loved and time with my family. Second, make them do a trial semester: one class from each school, before they commit to full-time on both. That would have shown me in eight weeks that I couldn’t keep up long-term, instead of being three years in with too much invested to quit. Third, get every single credit transfer agreement in writing, signed by advisors from both schools. No verbal deals, because policies change and people move on, and you’re the one stuck paying for extra classes.
If you’re already stuck like me, already regretting your choice and looking for a way to keep going without burning out, these are the small changes that have made it bearable for me. First, go to the advisor for the degree that matters less to your long-term goals, and ask about switching to part-time. I did this two months ago, and I went from three classes a semester at the online school to one. It pushes my graduation back a year, but my tuition went down $400 a month, and I’m no longer failing core classes for the biology degree I actually want more. Second, drop one non-required class right now, even if you lose the tuition for it. I dropped a 3-credit elective I didn’t need for either degree last semester, and that four extra hours a week let me start sleeping through the night again. Third, schedule two hours of unstructured, non-school time every single week, and put it in both of your school calendars as a “class” so you don’t book anything over it. I go to a cheap local pottery class that I don’t even care that much about, but it’s time I don’t have to think about essays or exams, and it’s enough to keep me from throwing in the towel.
I’m still halfway through, and some weeks I still stay up until 2 a.m. panicking about overlapping due dates. I still regret not just picking one degree and taking it slow, and I don’t know if all this stress will actually pay off with my dream grad school spot in the end. But these small changes have made it manageable. You don’t have to power through full speed just because you made a choice early on. It’s okay to adjust your plan, even after you’ve started.
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