How are those children with strong internal drive cultivated?

When children procrastinate on their homework, parents may feel anxious and discuss with them to finish their homework early.

This way, they can motivate their children to complete their homework with such material rewards. For example, if you finish your homework early, you can play on your phone or watch TV for 30 minutes.

2. You train well today and I’ll take you to buy Coke after class. 3. You wake up on time tomorrow morning, and I’ll buy you chocolate after school.

We refer to the above situation as external motivation, which is common in many families. In the short term, one or two material incentives will meet parents’ expectations, but after a period of time, material incentives will no longer be attractive to children, and the reward effect will become very small.

If children can only rely on their parents’ urging, preaching, and supervision to complete their studies, they will subconsciously believe that learning is their parents’ business, not their own.

They are only completing the tasks given to them by their parents, which will not only worsen the parent-child relationship but also gradually erode their motivation to learn.

But there is also a type of child who does not rely on external motivation, but rather comes from within.

We will see a situation where these children have a sense of victory in conquering difficulties when they complete a question or a test paper, and this sense of victory will motivate them to challenge new difficulties.

This situation is where the child’s intrinsic motivation drives them to actively learn. In fact, we should understand that the role of parents is not to supervise their children’s learning and life, but to guide and inspire their inner drive.

In today’s fiercely competitive society, children with strong internal drive are often better able to adapt to their environment and achieve self transcendence.

Internal drive, also known as intrinsic motivation, refers to the internal psychological drive of individuals to spontaneously engage in certain activities in order to meet their own needs.

The internal drive that children need is the ability to motivate and drive themselves. When children have self motivation, they will consciously learn, even without the urging of parents or the supervision of teachers, they can still maintain their enthusiasm for learning.

So, how are these children with strong internal drive cultivated. Based on communication with parents of such children, the following points can be summarized: Respect and Trust.

You should be clear that a family environment full of respect and trust is the cornerstone of cultivating children’s inner drive.

When children feel the trust and respect of their parents, they are more likely to develop autonomy and independence, thus forming strong intrinsic motivation.

If you plan to travel during the upcoming winter vacation, you can involve your 8-year-old child in the decision-making process of the travel plan.

Soliciting opinions: You can ask your child for their thoughts and preferences on travel destinations, listen carefully to their opinions, and explain why certain suggestions may be unrealistic or inappropriate.

Assign responsibility: Children can be responsible for a portion of the travel plan, such as selecting activities during the trip or managing a small portion of the budget, to make them feel that their opinions and efforts are valued.

Shared decision-making: When deciding on the final travel plan, you can discuss various options with your child, respect their ideas, and consider their preferences in the decision-making process.

Trust in children’s choices: Even if the child’s choices differ from the parents’ preferences, we should respect the child’s choices and support them in trying new things, which can reflect our trust in the child.

Encourage autonomy: During travel, we should encourage children to pack their own luggage, manage their belongings, and make small decisions such as choosing what to have for lunch.

Positive feedback: After the child successfully completes the assigned task, we should give positive feedback and praise to enhance the child’s confidence and self-efficacy.

Respect children’s efforts: Even if children make some small mistakes in their travel plans, we should patiently guide them instead of criticizing, emphasizing the importance of learning from mistakes.

Through this process, we can not only teach children how to participate in decision-making and take responsibility, but also help them build confidence and independence by respecting and trusting their choices.

This interaction of respect and trust helps children grow into responsible and autonomous individuals.

Encouraging exploration and affirmation can stimulate children’s curiosity and thirst for knowledge by encouraging them to explore the unknown and try new things.

This spirit of exploration is an important source of internal drive. Through continuous exploration, children acquire more knowledge and skills, and the sense of gain will enhance their happiness.

This joy of gain will encourage children to constantly pursue more new knowledge and skills. We often say ‘good children are praised’, and parents’ affirmation is the driving force for their children to actively strive for progress.

We should learn to discover the strengths and progress of our children, give concrete and sincere encouragement and affirmation, so that children can feel their efforts and progress.

For example, “I have noticed that you have made great progress in your writing recently. Your sentences are very fluent and your vocabulary is particularly accurate, which shows that you are really putting your heart into feeling life while accumulating materials.

” “I have noticed that your serving quality is really high recently. Your ball speed is not only fast, but also your landing points are very thoughtful.

Your hard work must be rewarded. Congratulations. ” “I have noticed that you have a high enthusiasm for learning English recently.

Your accuracy in dictation of words is getting higher and higher, and your writing is also very neat.

It shows that you are not only working hard but also very focused. ” Guided by interest, giving children the right to choose education methods according to their interests and hobbies can greatly improve them.

Passion and motivation for learning. When learning is combined with personal interests, children are more likely to exhibit sustained internal drive.

Parents should not impose their own wishes on their children’s education. For example, one of my neighbors, in order to make up for the regret of not learning cello in his childhood, disregarded his child’s opposition and enrolled him in cello classes.

Every weekend before going to class, he could see the mother and daughter pulling and pulling at the bottom of the unit, causing the child to cry and the mother to roar incessantly.

Moderate challenges can stimulate children’s fighting spirit and problem-solving abilities. We can enhance children’s confidence and cultivate stronger internal drive by setting reasonable goals and challenges to overcome difficulties.

I remember when Jelly first saw the climbing wall, he was very resistant, but he was also curious about the project.

I said, do you want to give it a try. He went from refusing at the beginning to only daring to climb up to one-third, and then slowly climbed up step by step until he challenged a complete rock path
When he succeeded, he looked at me from above and grinned heartily.

I believe that at that moment, the child had a sense of challenge, success, and confidence in their heart.

The power of role models: Role models around children, whether they are family members, teachers, or social celebrities, can have a profound impact on their behavior and attitudes.

After watching the final of the Macau World Cup in table tennis, Jelly completely fell in love with world champion Sun Yingsha.

He said to me, ‘Mom, do you know that when Sister Shasha fell behind by a large margin of 1-3, she remained calm and withstood the pressure.

In the end, she turned the tables against the wind. This is really amazing. I think fencing matches should also be like this.

You can’t give up until the last shot. ‘. In fact, he also demonstrated the spirit of never giving up during the competition.

During this summer’s participation in the provincial primary and secondary school student league, when the team reached the semi-finals, they were trailing behind the opponent 38:40.

As the team captain, he supported the team in the last game. The coach told me that he glanced at the scoreboard and went on stage with great determination.

He then chased the score with each sword, playing each sword clearly and firmly. In the end, he won the game with a score of 45:43, helping the team advance to the semi-finals.

So, a positive role model can inspire children to imitate their behavior, thereby cultivating strong internal drive.

Self efficacy refers to an individual’s confidence in their ability to complete specific tasks. By providing positive feedback to children after successfully completing tasks, their self-efficacy can be enhanced, thereby increasing their internal drive.

For example, in the process of a child learning to tie shoelaces, he overcomes the challenge of learning new skills through his own efforts and the encouragement of his parents, achieving an improvement in self-efficacy.

During this process, he experienced the entire journey from trial and error to ultimate success, which is crucial for building confidence and self-efficacy.

Goal setting ability teaches children how to set specific and achievable goals, and develop plans to achieve these goals, which is an important part of cultivating internal drive.

Note that guiding children to set goals that are not too ambitious can prevent them from developing fear of difficulties and giving up halfway.

These goals must be achievable. For example, learning 15-20 words per week, mastering 60 words proficiently in a month, and so on.

Goal setting ability can help children maintain motivation and keep moving forward. The cultivation of children with strong internal drive is not achieved overnight, it requires the joint efforts of family, education, and social culture.

By providing a supportive environment that encourages children to explore and challenge themselves, as well as cultivating their personal traits, we can help children develop strong internal drive and lay a solid foundation for their future.