The IIT/NIT Obsession: Whose Dream Are We Chasing?
Every summer in India, a familiar scene plays out in countless households. Parents hover over laptops, refreshing portals to check JEE Advanced or JEE Main results. Social media floods with celebratory posts: “Proud parents of an IITian!” or “Our child cracked NIT!” But behind the confetti and congratulations lies a quieter, more complex question: Are these institutions—revered as temples of technical education—truly about the child’s aspirations, or have they become trophies for parental pride?
The Parental Lens: A Mix of Hope and Pressure
For many Indian parents, the Indian Institutes of Technology (IITs) and National Institutes of Technology (NITs) symbolize more than just quality education. They represent stability, prestige, and a golden ticket to upward mobility. In a country where degrees from elite institutions often dictate societal standing, it’s easy to see why families invest emotionally and financially in this dream.
Take Mrs. Sharma, a homemaker from Jaipur. Her son, Rohan, spent two years preparing for JEE while attending coaching classes 12 hours a day. “I want him to have the opportunities I never did,” she says. For parents like her, IIT/NIT admissions aren’t just about academics—they’re about fulfilling unmet ambitions and securing bragging rights in their social circles. The pressure to “keep up” is real, especially in communities where a child’s success is seen as a reflection of parental worth.
But what happens when this dream isn’t shared by the child?
The Student’s Reality: Caught Between Expectations and Identity
Not every teenager dreams of engineering. Yet, the gravitational pull of IIT/NIT is so strong that many students find themselves on a path they didn’t choose. Consider Arjun, a 19-year-old from Chennai who cracked JEE but secretly longed to study design. “My parents said, ‘Do engineering first—you can always pursue hobbies later,’” he shares. Three semesters into mechanical engineering, Arjun feels trapped. “I’m good at coding, but I don’t love it. I’m here because it’s what my family wanted.”
Stories like Arjun’s aren’t uncommon. The rigid focus on cracking entrance exams often sidelines broader conversations about a child’s interests, mental health, or alternative career paths. Counseling psychologist Dr. Meena Kapoor notes, “Teens internalize this pressure. They tie their self-worth to exam ranks, fearing disappointment more than failure itself.”
The Social Fabric: Education as a Status Symbol
India’s education culture has long conflated institutional reputation with individual potential. A degree from IIT/NIT opens doors, but the obsession with the “tag” overshadows a critical truth: Success isn’t confined to brand names. Software engineer Priya Reddy, an NIT graduate, admits, “The ‘tag’ helped me land my first job. But what kept me growing was my passion for problem-solving—something no institution can instill if it’s not already there.”
Meanwhile, parents often overlook the challenges within these institutions. High dropout rates, academic stress, and the struggle to adapt are rarely discussed. For every student thriving at IIT Bombay, there’s another battling anxiety or switching majors. The “tag” guarantees neither happiness nor fulfillment.
Redefining Success: Bridging the Gap
So, how do families navigate this divide? The answer lies in shifting the narrative—from prestige to purpose.
1. Open Dialogue Over Assumptions
Parents and teens need safe spaces to discuss aspirations without judgment. A father in Kolkata, Mr. Das, recalls his daughter’s confession: “She wanted to study environmental science, not computer engineering. It was tough to accept initially, but seeing her thrive changed my perspective.”
2. Exploring Beyond the “Default”
Careers in AI, sustainability, digital arts, and entrepreneurship are booming—fields that didn’t exist when today’s parents were young. Encouraging exploration helps students align their goals with evolving industries.
3. Celebrating Effort, Not Just Outcomes
A child’s journey involves resilience, creativity, and growth—qualities that aren’t measured by entrance exams. Recognizing effort over rankings fosters healthier motivation.
The Way Forward: Whose Journey Is It, Anyway?
The IIT/NIT debate isn’t about dismissing these institutions’ value. It’s about asking who they’re serving. When a child’s education becomes a family’s social currency, we risk reducing their potential to a label.
As educator Ananya Joshi puts it, “A degree is a chapter, not the whole story. Real pride lies in watching a child carve their own path—whether it’s through IIT, a liberal arts college, or a vocational institute.”
In the end, the “tag” matters far less than the person wearing it. After all, a fulfilled, self-aware individual contributes more to society—and their family’s pride—than any institutional badge ever could.
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Names marked with an asterisk () have been changed to protect privacy.
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