Preparing Siblings for a New Baby: Childcare Solutions During Labor and Delivery
Welcoming a new baby is an exciting time for families, but it also raises a practical question: Who will care for your older children while you’re giving birth? Balancing the logistics of labor with the needs of existing kids can feel overwhelming, especially for first-time parents expanding their family. Let’s explore realistic strategies parents use to ensure their children are safe, comfortable, and supported during this transition.
1. Lean on Family and Close Friends
For many families, relatives or trusted friends are the go-to option. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, or even older cousins often step in to care for siblings during labor. This choice offers familiarity and comfort to children, reducing anxiety about being away from parents.
Pro tip: Prepare a “fun kit” for your older child to enjoy while you’re away. Include favorite snacks, toys, or activities that their caregiver can introduce to keep them engaged. If possible, arrange for the caregiver to spend time with your child before the birth to build rapport. For example, a trial sleepover at Grandma’s house can make the actual separation smoother.
2. Hire a Professional Doula or Babysitter
Not everyone has family nearby, but professional support can fill the gap. Postpartum doulas, babysitters with newborn experience, or even overnight nannies are trained to handle sibling care during labor. Websites like Care.com or local parenting groups often list vetted professionals.
Key consideration: Schedule a meet-and-greet beforehand to ensure your child feels comfortable with the caregiver. Discuss routines, allergies, and emergency protocols in detail. Some parents also create a shared document with schedules, pediatrician contacts, and comfort strategies (e.g., a favorite bedtime story).
3. Partner Tag-Teaming
In some cases, parents split responsibilities. One partner stays home with older children while the other goes to the hospital. This works best for families with flexible work schedules or those who live close to their birthing facility.
However, this approach has limitations. Labor timing is unpredictable, and parents may miss sharing the birth experience. To mitigate this, some families use video calls or hire a birth doula to support the laboring parent if their partner needs to step out temporarily.
4. Involve Older Children in the Process (When Appropriate)
For school-age kids, being part of the birth journey can be empowering—if they’re interested. Some families invite siblings to visit the hospital after delivery or involve them in preparing for the baby’s arrival (e.g., decorating the nursery).
That said, most young children won’t understand the medical aspects of labor. Be honest but age-appropriate: “Mommy/Daddy will be at the hospital so the doctors can help the baby come safely. You’ll stay with [caregiver], and we’ll call you as soon as you can meet your new sibling!”
5. Community Support Networks
Local parenting groups, religious organizations, or neighborhood associations often rally around expecting families. You might find parents willing to swap childcare favors or host a “babysitting chain” during emergencies. Apps like Meal Train can also coordinate meals for caregivers, reducing stress for everyone.
Real-life example: One mom in a parenting Facebook group posted, “Due in three weeks—anyone available for last-minute sibling care?” Multiple families volunteered, and she arranged backup options in case labor happened overnight.
6. Hospital-Based Childcare or Sibling Programs
A few hospitals offer onsite childcare or sibling doula services during deliveries. These programs are rare but worth researching. Alternatively, some birth centers allow older children to stay in a designated family room with a caregiver.
Call your hospital in advance to ask about policies. If siblings aren’t permitted in delivery rooms, ensure your caregiver has a plan for keeping them occupied nearby (e.g., a nearby park or children’s museum visit).
7. Prepare Kids Emotionally
No matter who cares for your child, emotional readiness matters. Books like The New Baby by Mercer Mayer or I’m a Big Sister/Brother by Joanna Cole can normalize the experience. Role-playing with dolls or practicing separations (e.g., short parent-free playdates) can also help.
Reassure your child that the separation is temporary: “We’ll always come back.” Avoid making promises about exact timelines (labor can take longer than expected), but emphasize that updates will be shared.
8. Backup Plans Are Essential
Labor rarely goes exactly as planned. What if your designated caregiver gets sick? Or you go into labor at 2 a.m.? Identify at least two backup options and share hospital bag essentials (car seats, emergency contacts) with all caregivers.
One dad shared, “Our neighbor had a key to our house and a list of instructions. When my wife’s labor started at midnight, I texted the neighbor to stay with our toddler until her aunt arrived in the morning.”
Final Thoughts
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer, but the goal is the same: ensuring your child feels secure while you focus on delivering their new sibling. Whether you rely on family, hire help, or tap into community resources, communication is key. Discuss options with your partner early, involve older kids in age-appropriate ways, and remember—flexibility and self-compassion go a long way during this exciting, chaotic time.
By planning thoughtfully, you’ll create a supportive environment for all your children as your family grows.
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