I’m a Father of Eight Kids—No Question Is Off Limits
Let’s get one thing straight: when you’re raising eight kids, life is anything but predictable. From chaotic mornings to late-night homework marathons, my household is a masterclass in organized chaos. People often ask how we manage it all—or if we’ve lost our minds. (Spoiler: Maybe a little.) But here’s the thing: parenting a large family isn’t just about survival; it’s about discovering joy in the messiness of life. Whether you’re a fellow parent, a curious observer, or someone dreaming of a big family, let’s tackle the questions you’ve been itching to ask.
“How Do You Keep Everyone on Schedule?”
Imagine trying to coordinate eight different school routines, extracurriculars, doctor’s appointments, and grocery lists. It’s like playing a never-ending game of Tetris. The key? Systems, systems, systems.
– Color-Coded Calendars: Every child has their own color on our shared Google Calendar. Basketball practice? Blue. Dance recital? Pink. Dentist appointments? Bright orange. Even my 6-year-old knows to check “the rainbow wall” (our kitchen monitor) daily.
– Teamwork Rules: Older kids help younger siblings with morning routines. My 14-year-old supervises breakfast, while the 12-year-old ensures backpacks are packed. It’s not perfect, but it fosters responsibility—and saves my sanity.
– The 10-Minute Buffer: We aim to leave the house 10 minutes early for everything. Why? Because someone will forget shoes, spill juice, or suddenly remember a science project due that day.
Does it always work? Nope. But flexibility is baked into the plan.
“Does It Ever Feel Overwhelming?”
Let’s be real: Some days, I’m one lost permission slip away from hiding in the pantry with a bag of chips. Raising eight kids is emotionally, physically, and mentally demanding. The laundry alone could qualify as a part-time job.
But here’s what keeps me grounded:
– The Power of Small Moments: When my toddler hands me a scribbled “I luv u” note or my teenager opens up about school stress, it reminds me why the chaos matters.
– Asking for Help: Pride has no place in parenting. We rely on grandparents, neighbors, and even trusted teens for babysitting. Community is everything.
– Embracing Imperfection: Our house isn’t Instagram-worthy. Dishes pile up, and someone’s socks never match. But laughter over a burnt casserole beats a spotless kitchen any day.
“How Do You Afford It All?”
Money talk is awkward but valid. People assume we’re rich—or reckless. The truth? We’re neither.
– Budgeting Like a Pro: We track every dollar. Bulk buying (hello, Costco!), hand-me-downs, and DIY repairs are lifesavers. The kids learn early that “new” isn’t always better.
– Prioritizing Needs Over Wants: Vacations are camping trips, not Disney cruises. Birthday gifts are modest but meaningful. We focus on experiences, not stuff.
– Creative Side Hustles: My wife and I both freelance to supplement income. Even the kids contribute by tutoring or babysitting. It’s a team effort.
“What About Your Marriage? Does It Get Neglected?”
My wife and I get this question a lot. Yes, romance changes when you’re outnumbered by children 8-to-2. But we’ve learned to nurture our relationship in small, intentional ways:
– Weekly “Coffee Dates”: Every Sunday morning, we sit on the porch with coffee—no kids allowed. Even 20 minutes of uninterrupted conversation keeps us connected.
– Tag-Team Parenting: We alternate “on-duty” nights so each of us gets downtime. Sometimes that means I handle bedtime while she reads a book, and vice versa.
– Remembering the “Why”: We revisit old photos and laugh about our pre-kids adventures. It’s a reminder that we’re partners, not just roommates in a parenting warzone.
“Do the Kids Get Along?”
Sibling rivalry? Oh, it’s a thing. But so is the bond they share.
– Shared Adventures: From backyard camping to movie marathons, we encourage activities that require teamwork. Yes, they bicker over who controls the TV remote—but they also defend each other fiercely at school.
– Individual Attention: Each child gets one-on-one time with me or my wife weekly. Even 15 minutes of undivided attention helps them feel seen in a busy household.
– Conflict as a Lesson: Arguments over chores or toys teach negotiation and empathy. We mediate when needed but often let them work it out. (Pro tip: “If you can’t share the Legos, nobody gets the Legos.”)
“Would You Recommend Having a Big Family?”
This is the million-dollar question. My answer? It depends.
A large family isn’t for everyone. It requires sacrifice, patience, and a tolerance for noise that would make a rock concert seem quiet. But if you thrive on love, laughter, and the beautiful chaos of human connection, it’s worth every sleepless night.
What’s the best part? Watching eight unique personalities grow into kind, resilient humans. My 16-year-old wants to be a teacher. The 8-year-old dreams of opening a bakery. The baby? Well, she’s mastering the art of crawling—for now.
So, ask me anything. But fair warning: If you stick around long enough, you might just find yourself babysitting.
Please indicate: Thinking In Educating » I’m a Father of Eight Kids—No Question Is Off Limits