“I’m a Dad of 8 Kids—Here’s What Life Actually Looks Like”
If you’re picturing a chaotic house with laundry piled to the ceiling, half-eaten cereal bowls on every surface, and a soundtrack of sibling debates about who stole whose socks… you’re not wrong. As a father of eight kids ranging from toddlers to teenagers, my life is equal parts exhausting, hilarious, and rewarding. Over the years, I’ve fielded a lot of questions—from curious strangers at the grocery store to friends wondering how we haven’t lost our minds yet. So, let’s dive into the top things people ask (and the answers I wish I’d known 15 years ago).
1. “How Do You Even Keep Track of Everyone?”
Let’s start with the basics: spreadsheets. No, really. My wife and I live by color-coded calendars, shared grocery lists, and a chore rotation that would make a military general proud. Each kid has a “zone” they’re responsible for (think: unloading the dishwasher, feeding the dog, or organizing the shoe pile by the door). But here’s the secret: flexibility is key. Someone’s always sick, someone forgets their homework, and someone inevitably loses their soccer cleats 10 minutes before practice. We’ve learned to pivot fast and laugh at the chaos.
Pro tip: Assign each child a unique water bottle color. Trust me—it saves 20 minutes of “Whose drink is this?!” drama daily.
2. “Do the Older Kids Get Stuck Parenting the Younger Ones?”
This is a big concern for people imagining a Cheaper by the Dozen scenario. While our older kids do help out (teenagers are great at tutoring math or reading bedtime stories), we’re strict about boundaries. My wife and I handle discipline, medical appointments, and big decisions. The older siblings aren’t substitute parents—they’re mentors. That said, seeing my 15-year-old teach her little brother how to ride a bike? That’s the kind of magic you can’t plan.
3. “What’s the Hardest Part?”
Two words: emotional bandwidth. With eight kids, someone is always needing something—a pep talk after a bad day, help with a science project, or just a hug. It’s easy to feel stretched thin. My wife and I have a nightly “tag-out” system: If one of us is tapped out, the other takes over. We also schedule one-on-one time with each child, even if it’s just a 10-minute walk around the block. Those small moments build trust and remind them they’re seen as individuals.
And let’s talk about guilt. Yes, I’ve missed a school play because another kid had a fever. Yes, I’ve served cereal for dinner when the week got away from us. But here’s what matters: Kids care more about presence than perfection.
4. “How Do You Afford It?”
Budgets, bulk shopping, and hand-me-downs. We buy secondhand clothes, cook massive batches of pasta, and prioritize experiences over stuff (library memberships > theme parks). But the real answer? Community. Friends pass along outgrown bikes. Relatives chip in for Christmas gifts. We’ve even swapped babysitting with neighbors for date nights. It’s not glamorous, but it works.
Fun fact: We’ve mastered the art of “hack parenting.” For example, a $5 kiddie pool + dollar-store toys = summer entertainment for hours.
5. “Do You Regret Having So Many Kids?”
Never. Are there days I hide in the bathroom just to finish a thought? Absolutely. But watching our family grow has taught me more about love, patience, and resilience than I ever imagined. The laughter at dinner, the inside jokes, the way they rally around each other during hard times—it’s a kind of joy that’s hard to describe.
That said, I’d be lying if I claimed we never considered stopping at three. Parenting is a rollercoaster, and big families aren’t for everyone. But for us, the chaos is part of the adventure.
6. “What’s Your 1 Survival Tip?”
Teamwork. My wife and I are a united front. We split duties based on strengths (she’s the homework guru; I’m the laundry ninja) and never undermine each other’s decisions in front of the kids. We also prioritize our marriage—weekly coffee dates, even if they’re on the porch after bedtime. Happy parents create a stable home, period.
7. “What Do Your Kids Think About Having So Many Siblings?”
They complain about sharing bathrooms and argue over the TV remote, but they also have built-in best friends. Recently, my 12-year-old said, “It’s like having a sleepover every night.” They learn negotiation, empathy, and conflict resolution by default—skills that’ll serve them forever. Plus, holidays are epic.
Final Thoughts: It’s Not About the Number
Whether you have one child or eight, parenting is messy, beautiful, and deeply personal. For us, a big family means multiplying the love, not dividing it. Sure, we might run out of hot water by 7:15 a.m., and yes, I’ve given up on ever finding the TV remote. But when I see my kids laughing together or supporting each other, I know we’ve built something irreplaceable.
Got more questions? Ask away—I’ve got stories for days.
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