The Sneaky Question We All Ask: “Is This Thing Really Worth My Time?”
You’re scrolling through your phone, minutes melting into an hour. Or maybe you’re sitting in yet another meeting that feels directionless. Perhaps you’re halfway through a lengthy online course, questioning its relevance. The thought bubbles up, quiet but persistent: “Is this thing a waste of my time?”
It’s a universal whisper. We ask it about hobbies, chores, relationships, jobs, and even the endless stream of content vying for our attention. In a world obsessed with productivity and optimization, feeling like our precious minutes are slipping away unproductively triggers genuine anxiety. But how do we really know if something is a waste of time? The answer is often less clear-cut than we imagine.
Why We Rush to Label Things “Wasteful”
Our instinct to categorize activities as “wasteful” often springs from a few key places:
1. The Cult of Busyness: We live in a society where being “busy” is often worn as a badge of honour. Activities that don’t contribute directly to tangible outputs – a finished report, a clean house, money earned – can feel inherently suspect. Relaxing, daydreaming, or pursuing a passion purely for joy can get unfairly slapped with the “wasteful” label simply because they don’t look like “work.”
2. The Tyranny of Immediate Results: We crave instant gratification. Learning a complex new skill takes hours of seemingly unrewarded effort before breakthroughs happen. Building deep relationships requires investment without guaranteed immediate returns. If we don’t see a quick payoff, impatience whispers, “This isn’t worth it.”
3. Misplaced Comparison: Seeing others seemingly achieve more, learn faster, or relax “better” can make our own activities feel less valuable. Scrolling social media often amplifies this, showcasing curated highlights that rarely reflect the messy, unproductive reality behind them. Comparing your journey to someone else’s highlight reel is a surefire way to feel your time is poorly spent.
4. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO): The sheer volume of options available – courses to take, skills to learn, places to see, people to meet – creates a background hum of anxiety. Choosing one thing inherently means not choosing countless others. This can make us second-guess even valuable pursuits: “Should I be doing that instead?”
Beyond the Binary: It’s Not Always “Waste” vs. “Worthwhile”
The problem with the “waste of time” question is its inherent binary nature. Life rarely fits neatly into such boxes. Here’s why:
The Value of Downtime & Play: Neuroscience shows our brains need periods of unfocused rest (like daydreaming or light leisure) for consolidation, creativity, and emotional regulation. That walk in the park, the time spent doodling, or the half-hour lost in a novel isn’t wasted – it’s essential cognitive maintenance. Play, even for adults, fosters innovation and reduces stress. Calling relaxation “wasteful” ignores its biological necessity.
The Long Game: Some investments take years to mature. That hour spent learning basic coding might feel useless now, but could unlock a career pivot years later. The time invested in building a network might seem slow, but lead to an unexpected opportunity. Skills like patience, empathy, or resilience are built through experiences that often feel inefficient in the moment. Judging an activity’s worth solely on immediate, measurable outcomes misses its potential long-term ripple effects.
Subjective Value Reigns Supreme: Ultimately, an activity’s worth is deeply personal. Spending two hours meticulously building a model train set might seem pointless to one person, but be pure, soul-nourishing joy to another. Reading fiction might be dismissed as “unproductive” by someone focused only on non-fiction, yet it builds empathy and understanding of the human condition. The key question isn’t “Is this objectively worthwhile?” but “Is this worthwhile to me, right now, based on my values and needs?”
The Learning in the “Waste”: Sometimes, what feels like wasted time teaches us valuable lessons. A project that failed spectacularly taught you what not to do next time. A boring meeting highlights ineffective communication practices to avoid. An unfulfilling hobby clarifies what you don’t enjoy, steering you towards something better. Even apparent dead-ends provide navigation data.
How to Make Smarter Calls About Your Time (Without the Guilt)
Instead of constantly worrying about waste, cultivate a more nuanced approach to evaluating how you spend your hours:
1. Get Clear on Your Values: What truly matters to you? Connection? Growth? Creativity? Security? Adventure? Knowing your core values acts like a compass. Does this activity align with one or more of them? If yes, it inherently holds value, even if it doesn’t produce a concrete “thing.”
2. Define Your “Why” for the Activity: Are you doing it out of obligation, habit, genuine interest, or a specific goal? Understanding your motivation helps assess its fit. An activity done purely for relaxation shouldn’t be judged by productivity metrics. One done for skill-building should be evaluated on progress.
3. Embrace Intentionality: Much “wasted” time feeling stems from passive engagement – mindless scrolling, autopilot chores, drifting through activities without purpose. Consciously choosing to relax, learn, connect, or create, even for short periods, banishes the feeling of time slipping away uncontrolled. Set an intention: “I’m spending the next 30 minutes reading for pure enjoyment,” or “I’m dedicating this hour to learning X.”
4. Use Frameworks (Loosely): Tools like the Eisenhower Matrix (Urgent/Important) can help prioritize tasks demanding immediate action. Ask:
Does this need to be done? (Urgency/Obligation)
Does this move me meaningfully towards a goal I care about? (Importance/Alignment)
Could this time be spent on something more aligned with my values or goals? (Opportunity Cost)
5. Listen to Your Energy: Does the activity drain you or energize you? Something necessary but draining might be worth it, but needs balancing with restorative activities. Something consistently draining and misaligned with your values is a stronger candidate for minimizing or eliminating.
6. Schedule “Worthwhile Waste”: Intentionally block time for activities whose value lies purely in joy, relaxation, or exploration – reading fiction, walking in nature, playing games, tinkering. Protect this time. Acknowledge its worth isn’t in output, but in input – input for your well-being and creativity.
7. Practice Reflection, Not Just Judgment: Instead of instantly labeling something “wasteful,” reflect afterwards:
How did I feel during the activity?
What, if anything, did I learn (about the task, myself, others)?
Did it meet the intention I set (even if that intention was just to relax)?
Does it align with my deeper values?
The Bottom Line: Redefining “Waste”
Ultimately, time only feels “wasted” when it’s spent unconsciously, misaligned with our deeper values, and devoid of any present-moment awareness or future potential benefit. It’s less about the activity itself and more about our relationship to it.
Learning the guitar might involve hours of frustrating practice that feels futile, but aligned with a passion for music, it’s valuable. Scrolling news feeds can be informative, but done compulsively for hours instead of sleeping, it becomes draining.
Stop asking the overly simplistic question, “Is this thing a waste of time?” Start asking richer ones: “Is this serving me? Does it align with who I am and who I want to be? Am I choosing this intentionally?”
When you shift the focus from external productivity metrics to internal alignment and conscious choice, you reclaim your time. You might just discover that what you once dismissed as “waste” was actually an essential ingredient for a richer, more balanced, and truly fulfilling life. Sometimes, the most valuable things we do don’t look productive at all – they just feel like living.
Please indicate: Thinking In Educating » The Sneaky Question We All Ask: “Is This Thing Really Worth My Time