Do Parents Truly Enjoy Parenthood? A Candid Look at Reddit’s Rawest Confessions
Parenthood is often painted as life’s ultimate joy—a magical journey of milestones, giggles, and bedtime stories. But behind the Instagram-perfect family photos and holiday cards, there’s a messy, exhausting, and deeply human reality. When Reddit users recently posed the question, “Parents of Reddit, do you genuinely enjoy being parents?” the responses revealed a raw, unfiltered look at modern parenting. From tearful confessions of regret to heartfelt declarations of love, the thread became a safe space for honesty. Let’s unpack what thousands of parents shared—and what it says about the complexities of raising kids today.
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The Good, the Hard, and the “I Didn’t Know It Would Be Like This”
One of the most common themes across Reddit threads is the duality of parenting: the simultaneous joy and struggle. “It’s like running a marathon while carrying a backpack full of rocks—except the rocks sometimes hug you and say ‘I love you,’” wrote a user named DadJokes4Life. Many parents described moments of profound connection—like watching their child master a new skill or share an unprompted “thank you”—that made the sleepless nights feel worth it.
But for others, the emotional and physical demands overshadowed the positives. A user named SleepDeprivedMom23 admitted, “I love my kids, but if I could go back, I wouldn’t do it again. The constant giving has left me empty.” These candid admissions highlight a rarely discussed truth: not every parent finds fulfillment in the role, and societal pressure to “cherish every moment” can amplify feelings of guilt.
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Why Some Parents Thrive—and Others Merely Survive
Digging deeper into the replies, patterns emerged about what shapes parental satisfaction. Factors like support systems, financial stability, and mental health played starring roles. Parents with strong networks (think: involved partners, nearby grandparents, or reliable childcare) were more likely to express enjoyment. “My village keeps me sane,” shared CoffeeAndChaos, a mom of twins. “Without them, I’d be drowning.”
Conversely, those lacking support often described parenthood as isolating. Financial stress also loomed large. “I wanted three kids, but after one, we’re barely scraping by,” confessed BrokenPiggyBank. “How can I ‘enjoy’ parenting when I’m terrified of the next unexpected expense?” These stories underscore how systemic issues—like the high cost of living and inadequate parental leave policies—directly impact personal fulfillment.
Mental health emerged as another critical factor. Parents managing anxiety, depression, or unresolved trauma frequently described feeling “trapped” by their responsibilities. “My kids deserve better than a mom who’s just going through the motions,” wrote AnonMom123, sparking a flood of supportive replies urging her to seek therapy.
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The Cultural Script vs. Reality
Many Redditors pointed to societal narratives that glorify parenthood while downplaying its challenges. “No one talks about how boring it can be,” joked DadBodZen, describing hours spent watching repetitive kids’ shows. Others criticized the “rose-tinted” portrayal of family life in media, which often ignores the monotony of chores, the strain on relationships, or the loss of personal identity.
A user named FormerBookworm lamented, “I used to devour novels. Now I’m lucky to finish a grocery list. I miss who I was before kids.” This sentiment—of mourning a pre-parental self—came up repeatedly. Yet, some found ways to reconcile their old and new identities. “I’ll get back to my hobbies someday,” wrote GuitarDad, “but right now, teaching my son to play ‘Twinkle Twinkle’ on a tiny violin is its own kind of magic.”
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The Role of Age, Timing, and Expectations
Interestingly, age and life stage influenced perspectives. Older parents (those who had kids in their 30s or 40s) often reported higher satisfaction, citing emotional readiness and established careers. “I traveled, partied, and built my business first,” said LateBloomMom. “Now I’m all in on parenting, and it feels right.”
Younger parents, however, expressed more ambivalence. “I had my daughter at 21,” shared StudentDad. “Love her to death, but I’m envious of friends who are finishing degrees or backpacking through Europe.” Meanwhile, parents of children with disabilities or chronic illnesses described a unique mix of resilience and exhaustion. “My love for my son is infinite, but the system isn’t built for kids like him,” wrote AutismAdvocateMom. “Fighting for his needs is a full-time job.”
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The Complicated Truth: It’s Okay to Feel Both Ways
What ties these stories together is the universality of mixed emotions. Parenthood isn’t a binary experience of “love it” or “hate it”—it’s a spectrum that shifts daily. “Some days, I’m counting down the minutes until bedtime,” admitted MomOfToddlers. “Other days, I cry because they’re growing up too fast.”
Reddit’s anonymity provides a rare outlet for these contradictions. Unlike polished social media feeds, the platform lets parents admit, “I regret this” without fear of judgment. Yet, even those who struggled often emphasized that regret doesn’t equate to a lack of love. “I’d take a bullet for my kids,” wrote one user, “but I mourn the life I lost.”
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Finding Joy in the Mess
So, do parents genuinely enjoy being parents? The answer is as varied as parenting itself. For some, it’s a deeply fulfilling calling. For others, it’s a role they endure rather than embrace. But amid the chaos, many Redditors shared small, grounding moments that kept them going: a child’s laughter, a handmade Mother’s Day card, or the quiet pride of seeing kindness in their kids.
As ZenDad2023 wisely concluded, “Parenting is like a garden. It’s backbreaking work, pests show up uninvited, and sometimes things don’t grow how you planned. But when you step back and see the whole picture? Damn, it’s beautiful.”
Whether you’re a parent nodding along or someone weighing the decision, the takeaway is clear: there’s no “right” way to feel about parenthood—only your truth. And sometimes, the bravest thing a parent can do is say, “This is harder than I expected,” and still show up tomorrow.
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